I don’t talk about it much, but growing up I had a bit of a rocky childhood. Not necessarily the best circumstances, but I kind of plowed through and closed the door on that chapter of my life when I left for college.
Well, recently at the prompting of a wise friend I have been seeing a counselor to unpack some of this baggage from my childhood. (Holy cow, I just admitted to you that I’m seeing a counselor – yikes!) I really didn’t realize how much I had carried with me. I thought I was bigger than those circumstances. I thought it was trivial to blame my past for the challenges of the present. I figured everyone has a tough childhood, so don’t let yourself wallow in it. MOVE ON!
Trouble is, I thought I was moving on but I was really on a treadmill going no where. I was moving but I wasn’t making progress.
Revisiting the pain of some of the circumstances of my childhood just plain SUCKS! I’m learning how my perceptions in those days have shaped how I view life and the relationships around me these days.
Up until a few weeks ago, I so thought I had it all together. But, no. Not even close. There is so much I am relearning about:
- God’s unconditional love for me
- The value of who I am because of who God made me and not what I do
- That others like me, even love me, for me and not for what I do
Revisiting pain has not been fun, but I know that God is doing bigger things in my heart because of it. I would encourage you to consider if there is some pain that you have buried, closed the door on, stuffed out of sight.
Do you need to revisit it and allow God to heal you?