Do You Want to Be Popular or Do You Want to Be a Leader?
Middle school and high school were miserable for me.
I desperately wanted to fit in and be liked by the popular kids. But I was awkward, quiet, shy and
a little A LOT insecure. I wanted so much to fit in that I stifled so much of who I was.
As a result, I never really made a mark with that season of my life.
My fear of not being popular kept me from being who I was. In looking back, I think if I had asserted myself and my natural leadership instincts I might not only have been a good leader to my peers, I may have also gained some popularity along the way.
Because I stifled my uniqueness, I neutered myself from having any influence whatsoever. I was neither popular nor a leader.
Fast forward 20 years and I still see the same tendencies in myself. While I’m much more comfortable with the fact that being a leader is part of who God has created me to be, I still shrink back some days. I still long to just fit in and be accepted. I don’t want to be the one making all the difficult decisions all the time. I want to blend into the crowd – the popular crowd, that is.
I want to be loved and accepted for who I am without actually being who I am.
It doesn’t work.
I can’t want to be liked more than I want to be who God has called me to be.
I can’t want to be known more than I want to do what’s right.
I can’t want to be popular more than I want to be a Godly leader.
So anytime I don’t feel like being the leader I need to be, all it takes is a flashback to my awkward 14 year old self to remember that while I won’t always be popular, I’ll always be more comfortable being the leader God has called me to be.
Do you ever struggle with wanting to be accepted more than wanting to do what you’re called to do?